Get Rid of Hemorrhoids

What are hemorrhoids?

External hemorrhoids already exist in every person inside the anus. They're not newly grown. And they're not being a pain in the butt for no reason. They're actually the little veiny cushions in your bottom that help poo move along and out.

Internal hemorrhoids are further inside and are prone to swelling if you strain on the toilet.
These are also veins.

If you have blood in your poo or your bottom itches or burns. Then you may have inflamed hemorrhoids.

Diet and exercise is the main cure. Also, avoid rubbing harsh toilet paper on your bottom. Lastly, place an ice cube wrapped in underwear on the swollen area.

If you need more information than this, then I suggest you buy my new booklet:


Limited time: Use promotional code below for your discounted copy. Please take advantage of this while you can.
Promotional price: $1.78
Coupon Code: XE35K
Expires: March 1, 2013 or when purchase limit is reached.  

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/276726?ref=matclarke

Goes on sale in a few days!
On Sale now!

More information to come soon
See new blog post for more information :)
http://matclarke.blogspot.com.au/2013/01/dont-panic-theyre-just-hemorrhoids.html

3D printing - an actual object in your hands with moving parts

Did anyone else already know about 3D printing? I must be way behind. I only found out today you can buy a home printer from $1,000. You can make your own vinyl records (not sure if they're actually vinyl though). You print from a 3D file on your computer. Or backwards engineer from a laser scan of an already existing object. Good bye, buying from China. Hello, make it yourself!

From News.com:
"3D printing really took off in 2012. For the uninitiated, you can print sunglass frames, machinery, shoes, headphones and even fabrics—almost anything is on the cards and is limited only by the size of the printer, the quality of the digital model, the type and quality of the printing compound and, of course, imagination"

Tunnel-Bridge across lower Port Phillip, Melbourne

What is a Tunnel-Bridge?

I’ve seen bridge-tunnels that run across the water and then dip down below a channel crossing to allow ships to pass, but I’ve never heard of a Tunnel-Bridge. It’s the other way around, right?
And is that a good enough reason to start building one?
No? Well, hmm, okay, how can I talk you into it... What if the reason was to conserve the areas around beaches, homes and national parks. Interested yet?

Yes or no, I’m still going to explain the premise and then where one needs to go.

For decades there has been talk of building a bridge to connect east and west Melbourne down Portsea and Queenscliff way. Maybe they will one day, or maybe they’ll build a tunnel.
But tunnels are boring, more expensive, won’t show off a brilliant new icon of Melbourne (like the Golden Gate Bridge), and can’t carry as much traffic as a long bridge.
Yes, I hear you say, but putting in a bridge means we have to build on-ramps and-off ramps and dredge up the earth across our beach. Not to mention there is no road which leads to the water’s edge that can sustain that much traffic!
Well, if the penny has dropped yet, you’ll see that the Tunnel-Bridge is the perfect option.
At present there are already plans to run the freeway (motorway) from the Mornington Peninsula Freeway to Melbourne Road. Then widen Melbourne Road all the way to Portsea. Once that is done, the work on the Tunnel-Bridge can begin.

A possibly likely beginning point would be at the intersection of Hotham Road in Portsea, just before the Golf Course. Here, once the tunnel is built, we travel under the earth and under the golf course until we’re then traveling under water.
Suddenly your car bursts out of the ocean on a road approximately 500 metres from shore and climbs into the air that will be Melbourne’s new iconic bridge.
It veers west and follows the route the ferry takes.
(The ferry will then be a good way tourists can see the bridge from another side).
As the car on the bridge closes on the shipping channel they rise further into the air until towering over everything. Then finally as the west coast comes into view it descends to join - not the shore of Queenscliff, but instead Point Lonsdale and the Bellarine Highway.

Now traffic between these areas will swell, not just because of the people wanting to see the bridge, and not just because there’s now easy access to Geelong, but because the city of Geelong will now want to share in that side of the coast. Housing will suddenly boom over the west and the two sides will be linked and population and traffic will be explosive.

Hang on, that much traffic travelling through! The roads won’t be able to support it. Sure, the new bridge and tunnel will be able to if the engineers allowed for the right amount of cars not just for today, but 20 years into the future, but the surrounding roads will boil and pop.
Hmm, so what do we do when there are so many cars on the roads that pollution, road rage, and traffic jams become a problem. Well, we put in train lines. Something the Victorian Government is loath to do.
Crazy that they don’t.
My thought is that whenever a bridge, tunnel, freeway, or tollway is built, then a trainline should be built alongside. Or over, or in between, or somewhere. You can’t just keep building more roads everywhere, you need to introduce more trains.
The artery of the commuter and the tourist.

All existing freeways should also have a train line built alongside it.

Frankston and Geelong should then be linked with a train line. If the government doesn’t do it then it will be at their own peril.
Instead of taking money from people because they use a necessity, which is electricity, politicians should use the grey matter in their head and develop new ideas that reduce pollution without robbing people blind. Yes, that’s right, trains. Trains move many people from one place to the next and do it well. Suddenly because the government has built more trainlines they don’t need to spend millions on other ways to reduce pollution. You’ve already got the basis there. You don’t need an invention. The technology has been around for ages. Put down train lines!

So there you have it, a good reason to build a magnificent bridge for all Australian people to admire. And a side note was that the public need more trainlines. Not just for travel sake, but to also reduce pollution and congestion on the roads.

Anthology of short stories III - Writers wanted!

Anthology III 2012

Themed: April Fools

Brought to you by the Melbourne Writers’ Social Group

Sponsored by the Story Mint

WRITERS WANTED!

Read on to be a part of this amazing anthology of short stories.

All styles of writing are eligible for the anthology. Register between now and February 1st 2013. Create a great story and get it to a fully edited stage before March 2013.

All guidelines will be emailed to you after you register.

This is our third anthology of short stories and will be published on April 1st 2013. Themed April Fools.

Our anthologies are born from a different theme with each publication. The first being, Valentine’s Day (2012). As you would expect many of the tales were quite sweet. Yet, we also had stories that endevoured to chill the hearts of our reader’s.

Our following anthology was published December 2012, The Holiday Season in Melbourne. Each unique Melbourne tale satisfyingly different and touching on a wide variety of holiday seasoned themes.             

You can download either of these anthologies online:

Anthology I:

http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/130549

Anthology II:

www.amazon.com/MWSG-Anthology-II-Melbourne-ebook/dp/B00AMPC70O/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1355349010&sr=8-3&keywords=anthology+melbourne

We don’t mind what genre you choose, but you must include some reference to April Fools, no matter how small. And a reference to Melbourne (Australia) must be included, even if in passing.

One submission per person only.

Word count for you story (fiction or non-fiction): 1000-2000 words. Unfortunately we can not have any exceptions to this rule. Even if it is one word outside of this limit your story will not be considered.

If you intend on submitting a poem, then the word count is different: 500 words maximum. No minimum.

Please register your interest to be involved with this anthology by emailing Mat Clarke: matclarke.author@gmail.com

Registration opens December 14 2012 and closes February 1st 11.59pm.

After you have emailed Mat Clarke you willll be contacted within 3 business days and emailed an easy to fill in form to read and complete.

The information emailed to you includes the process we go through to ensure we publish quality work. Please make sure you read the information carefully.

You can of course email Mat back if unsure about anything.

All money earned from the sales of the anthologies (a very small amount) is put back into running the next one and holding the weekly meetings and other events with the Melbourne Writers’ Social Group - which are free to attend :)Anthology II

April Fools

Brought to you by the Melbourne Writers’ Social Group

Sponsored by the Story Mint

Australian DJs prank UK Hospital to speak to Kate

Ok, so I just listened to the recording and it seems actually quite harmless. I have to be careful what I say here so people don't get upset, but the actual prank did seem as if the DJs were not being malicious in any way and were just doing a very simple and very mild prank, which turned out to be actually funny (while they were doing the prank, NOT afterwards) because their accents were so terrible!
It's a real shame that it went pear-shaped after that and a life was lost.
The woman that committed suicide was only on the phone for 3 seconds to answer the phone, then patched it through. It was the following woman that told of Kate's condition. However, she still didn't give out any information that wasn't already known.
As far as I can see, no real harm done. A simple mistake by the nurse(s) that were probably having a busy day dealing with loads of people and reporters and unfortunately got fooled by some DJs that probably didn't even think they would get through to the nurse(s) in the first place.
If we're talking pranks, look at what the Chaser team did when they infiltrated the APEC with a false motorcade.
Anyway, listen to the recording of the DJs and you decide: http://americanlivewire.com/kate-middleton-prank-call/

Beauty, style, fashion - get it here!

Okay, so I'm stepping outside my usual blogging stuff and helping to advertise an amazing fashion show at the exhibition building (Jeff's Shed) for 2013. The person running it has set up a great website with fantastic offers for every kind of person no matter what you're after.
Check it out and have a read of the ABOUT page. Women readers, you are going to get terribly excited!
http://www.thebeautyshow.com.au/

Tell your friends and get your tickets ASAP, it's going to be a great show!

Anthology of Short Stories II

Tuesday 11th December at 6pm, come along to the Wharf Hotel Melbourne for the Short Story Anthology Launch, by the Melbourne Writers' Social Group.
Have a chat about writing and everything else. Listen to a few short excerpts from the anthology and support us silly creative people :)

Why not come along and show off your creative work as well! There'll be lots of people interested in new or established authors.

Also we will announce the next anthology. To be completed by end of March 2013. WRITERS WANTED!
http://www.meetup.com/The-Melbourne-Writers-Meetup-Group/events/91770542/

Also, for you meat eaters it's $15 steak night!
Discount drinks too! Become a member for free on the night. Takes 30 seconds.